The dating world can be a challenging place. It can be just as tough to date someone who just got out of a long term relationship as it can be to date someone who has been single for a long time. Being single means being yourself and not having to answer to anybody. It can be tough to adjust when someone new is on the scene.
Look out for these signs if you’re dating a girl who has been single for a while before ‘getting back into the game’ so to speak.
1. A WOMAN WHO WAS SINGLE MIGHT BE STUBBORN
She’s spent quite a bit of time being single and having to do things on her own. She hasn’t had to share anything with anyone and it may seem to her like you are invading her space or encroaching on her territory.
Whether this is real or imagined, she will need time to lower her guard and come to see you as a partner. Don’t be surprised if she is rigid or stubborn at first.
2. SHE MIGHT SEEM TOUGH
A single woman has to project strength otherwise she may be vulnerable to others in her life. That doesn’t just mean other men: it could be coworkers, friends, or relatives.
Be patient and understanding. Let things go at a pace that is comfortable for her. Her outward toughness is something she’s needed to get through life by herself.
3. SHE WON’T WANT TO TAKE THINGS TOO FAST
Don’t think that it’s because she doesn’t like you; she does.
However she has gotten so used to the idea of doing things at her speed and at her pace that jumping into something serious might seem fast for her. Give her time.
4. HER FRIENDS WILL PROBABLY BE OVERPROTECTIVE
Think about it, this is a trifecta of suspicion.
You are new in her life so her friends will be wary of you. She has spent a long time being alone and her friends don’t want her to make a mistake because she has been alone. She projects an outward toughness which tells her friends that she likes being by herself.
“So what’s the deal with the new man?” is what they’ll be asking themselves. Be patient and friendly, they only want what is best for their friend.
5. DON’T EXPECT HER TO LET YOU KNOW WHEN SHE DOES SOMETHING SHE WANTS
Remember, she has been independent for quite some time. That kind of freedom doesn’t wear off right away.
If you pressure her into conforming into the groove of a relationship early she may resent you for it. Remember how she is stubborn and rigid about a new partner encroaching on her territory? The same rules apply.
6. SHE’LL RESIST YOU DOING THINGS FOR HER
It’s not your fault.
She has spent so long taking care of herself that she may not see an immediate need for you to do things for her. Or, she’ll simply be more comfortable doing them herself.
Ease into helping her with things and don’t be surprised if she throws up roadblocks. Remember, it may take time for her to see you as a partner.
7. SHE WILL BE RESERVED
There are many reasons she may not want to share everything with you right away. She may feel that it makes her seem less independent or that she wants to take everything slow. She may have been hurt in the past or doesn’t fully trust you yet. All of these things are okay.
Go at her speed and be forthcoming with her.
8. DESPITE BEING TOUGH ON THE OUTSIDE SHE CAN BE AFRAID
Even though she projects a tough persona she will be afraid of becoming vulnerable and allowing someone new into her life. Unless you really do know her story you don’t know what her past has been like (everyone has one).
She may have been hurt in the past or she may be cautious about being in love or even loved at all. Talk with her, and go at her pace.
9. SHE WILL QUESTION YOUR MOTIVES, EVEN IF YOU ARE FORTHCOMING
We all know the horror stories of the women who have been tricked or hurt. She also may adopt the same suspicions her friends have toward you. Bringing you into her life and stepping into yours is a huge change from her normal routine.
Being single for so long has taught her to figure things out for herself and she will examine everything that you do. Be forthcoming and reassuring. Most importantly, don’t do anything to betray her trust.
10. DON’T BE AFRAID TO GIVE HER SPACE WHEN SHE NEEDS IT
Everybody needs some space sometimes, but someone who has spent a lot of time being single might need it more often than you might expect.
Remember, she has been spending all of her time without having to share her life with you. It may take her some time to see you as a partner and not as someone who is ‘encroaching on her territory’.